Sex: Is it OK for Women to Make the First Move?

The feminist movement has done a lot to improve the status and equality of women in society. However, many things are still lacking. For example, women, on average, are still paid less than their male counterparts for doing the same jobs. In addition, despite the sexual revolution, which did much to alter the perceptions of female sexuality, some people still believe that it is ‘wrong’ for women to be sexually assertive and certainly ‘unladylike’ for a woman to make the first move.

Now, my opinion on the matter could not be more strong. As far as I’m concerned, it’s perfectly acceptable for a woman to instigate a sexual encounter, be it in a long-term relationship or with a new partner. And I think most right-minded women would agree with me, but what about men?

image (35)What do Men Think of Sexually Forward Women?
Traditionally, we’ve been led to believe that all men want a submissive damsel, they want to woo and win their lovers, which is no fun if the lover in question is already up for it. However, I don’t think life is that simple and I certainly don’t think that relationships can be so simplistically pigeon-holed. Yes, sometimes men like to be the assertive partner, but they also like to be seduced, romanced and surprised by a woman who ‘wants him now’. So, we all accept that there is ebb and flow in the initiation of sex in a relationship, right? Right.

What about in a new relationship, though? In the dating days, it’s a man’s job to see how far he can get and it’s the woman’s place to say “no.” Why? Where does it say that we have to play these silly games? If you feel an attraction to a guy, if there’s chemistry and you want to become physically intimate, why shouldn’t you throw all those conventions out of the window and go for it?

Will he Think You’re ‘Easy’ if You Make the First Move?
My guess is some of you will be saying, “yes, that’s all well and good, but will he think I do that with every guy I meet?” Maybe, maybe not. The question is, do you do that with every guy you meet? And if the answer is “yes”, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. If the answer is “no” and you’re honest with him about the chemistry you feel, he will probably just feel extremely flattered.

Now, of course, there is the old maxim “he won’t buy the cow if he cant get the milk for free.” Realistically speaking, how many couples actually hold out until they’re married? These days, relatively few. For men, committing to a relationship has nothing to do with whether or not you hold out for sex. Instead, it is down to whether he feels ready to settle and, most importantly, whether he is in love. So, simply withholding sex is not going to be enough to make him get down on bended knee.

All that said, women do, of course, need to be aware that some men are the love ’em and leave ’em types. So, you should guard your heart, but never feel that you have to temper your sexuality or your desires, because you’re worried about what a man, or anyone else for that matter, will think of you. Overall perceptions of female sexuality won’t change until we make it happen.

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